Let's Celebrate, It's All Right!

This past week is just a blur. We had Haille Rae from Sunday evening to yesterday afternoon... and I was the one that took care of her most of the time. And even when my aunt WAS here she wasn't really and so I was saddled with the responsibility. Which is fine, but I would have liked a little ME time, ya know?

Anyway Haille and I baked cookies, played, watching Snow White several times each day (my fault, we did a Princess movie marathon and she fell in love with Snow White above all the others because she loves "the Witch" lol) and had a pretty good time. Poor baby had a cold so we didn't get to do anything that I promised her we would (like go to the zoo and play outside in the snow) but she didn't seem to mind. She LOVED helping to roll out the dough and cut the cookies... and the frosting was even more fun. Yuka had pink fur at one point. It was pretty interesting.

Mostly, though, we just watched Mickey Mouse and Snow White because she was sick and didn't want to do a whole lot. She also sat with her little vtech laptop next to me while I was working on mine ha ha! She is so stinking cute that it isn't funny!

Christmas Eve had EVERYONE over here. And I do mean everyone. My parents and Brother got here around 5, and then everyone started showing up. G'ma, G'pa... Jim Louisa & their two kids AND two dogs. Jeff and Lindsay and Lindsay's dog Mazel plus Jeff brought Willie even after Gpa said not to lol. We had EIGHT DOGS in the house... we sent the more rambuncious ones outside and so we ended up with SIX in the living room. INSANITY. But it was good times. The kids got to open the presents we had on hand here as well as the adults that we planned on giving. Haille got to open ONE of her gifts... and it just happened to be the one from my parents (actually I gave her one box but it wasn't as big as the boxes that Trinity and Dimitri got so I had to go digging around for one that was the same basic size lol) My mom made her a Princess blanket that had the three classics on it. Cinderella, Snow White, and Sleeping Beauty. You would have thought the child had a golden ticket the way she flipped out. She was over the moon in love with that thing because it had SNOW WHITE on it. It was so cute!

I had a heck of a time finding where I'd put Trinity's gift, but she loved hers too. It's a Hannah Montana Varisty style Jacket and it has her name on it. She was so in awe of it having her name on it. She didn't take it off the rest of the night!

Christmas morning we opened all of our gifts and I had to say that it was probably one of the nicest we've had in a while. Even with the fact that we were all on a smaller budget everyone was so thankful and I think the budget had something to do with it. Instead of getting a bunch of things that maybe seem like what would be good... we had to THINK about that one or two special gifts for that person. My parents did something I wasn't expecting at all they got me a Studio Light set up. Two lamps complete with everything from umprellas to stands to extra bulbs... I was just not expecting that at all. I know how much those cost! They got it direct from B&H too. So it weren't cheap! And it wasn't a 'whole family' pitch in project either like my camera was. I was just floored.

Gaylord also got me camera stuff... a very nice monopod (I've always wanted one) and a filter that works with digital cameras... now I just have to remember how to use filters lol.

I got a few other things, mainly $$ for my upcoming trip (almost $200 worth lol) but I was just enjoying being with my family. I miss my mom and dad... 'specially dad. We had a great time.

We went to the g'parents' for dinner and had a great time... dad was telling stories about when I was little and Haille was hanging with my cousin's kids... she was totally in love with Dimitri who is about 2 years older than she is lol she calls him "The boy" it was so cute. He was teaching her how to play a game on his new Nintendo DS system. Surprisingly she was catching on pretty dang quick. I was impressed. She told Judy that she wanted one for Christmas next year ha ha!

Well, I am uploading songs to my ipod (which my awesome best friend got for me for Christmas even though she wasn't supposed to get me ANYTHING, the buttface) on Judy's computer since my laptop won't talk to my ipod (and vice versa...) so I best get back to that. Hope everyone had a wonderful holiday and long weekend!

...I'm hiding out in my room because I'm so sick of Judy pretending that she thinks I'm good enough as a photographer. She's now not sure if she wants me or Gaylord to take Haille's Christmas pictures because "he's had more practice." Yeah, well, the kid doesn't like him - so we'll see how THAT goes. That and she said it'd be nice if he could get in on the Alaska Wedding Fair because it'd be nice to have a decent wedding photog in the area.

Gee. Thanks.

I mentioned Tasha Grossl as being one of the best in S. Central AK and she said I was biased. Um, yeah, chick gets called to all over and is one of the most expensive AND sought after photogs in teh state. But yeah, I'm biased.

Judy's still ticked that I've already said I don't want Gaylord to be on 'retainer' for whenver I get married. I'd like to have SOME say in who gets to be part of my day. If it's not Tasha it'd be Casey Chappel (because she'd either fly up here on my dime to do it, or I'd for whatever reason be getting hitched outside of Alaska - fat chance, but still...). For whatever reason that discussion still bothers Judy. Because it proves I don't accept Gaylord. Um, no, I've seen his wedding photography and if I wanted crappy run of the mill non-photojournalistic prison wedding photos I'd call him. It's not that he isn't good, he's just so straight up and down traditional and I'd rather not do that.

He also said that my work would be better if I tried to be more traditional (ie, no creative angles.. no 'fun shots' other than sunglasses for the guys and the girls showing some leg and the 'traditional' fun shots... the boring stuff). Quite frankly that's not me so if I ever find a guy and get married Gaylord is not the photog that fits me.

Not only that but I'd have to get a second eye because there ain't no way I'm letting a guy into the girls dressing room. Why do that when there are female photogs able to do just as much and more than he can?

BLAH!

That really wasn't what I was going to write about in here lol. We just got into it for the millionth time and I'm just so tired of it.

Anyway I applied with the local Census Bureau office here in Anchorage to be one of those annoying people that comes to your house and knocks on your door and counts you for the 2010 consensus. Hooray for me! Monday at 5pm I have to go into their testing area (Church of Christ close by) and do an interview, paperwork, and take a test (they want to make sure that I can read a map according to the guy I talked to). Haille will be here starting Sunday so I have to take her over to Judy's work before I go over for testing... The guy told me that I would be there for about an hour and a half ot two hours. I'm a bit nervous but hopefully it works out. It's a great hourly rate (17 bucks and change) plus milage! So that's pretty stinkin awesome. It's also parttime so I can still work on photography (hopefully).

I just hope that the Disney World trip won't make me inelligible as you have to committ to at least 20 hours a week. But I wouldn't think it'd be that big a problem, right?


Speaking of Miss Rae - I'm trying very hard to make cookies she can eat, but it's very difficult when the ingredients she can have are no where to be found! UGH! All I need is goat's milk BUTTER... but does anyone up here carry it? nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! BLAH! Poor kid needs Christmas cookies, ok?

there was something else I was going to talk about but I can't remember what it is... so after staring at this screen for fifteen minutes trying to figure it out I'm going to just sign off. ta!

Mom and Dad are coming up for just Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. Dad has to work Friday evening, so they'll leave early that morning. :( I'm bummed, but two days is better than none!

I am pretty much done shopping. I just need to get a picture frame and I'm done! *woot*


we're also 27 days away from - you guessed it - Disney! yay for multiple countdowns!

Just as I was laying down to get some sleep my bed collapsed. They had been on risers and, so, I came crashing down (as did Yuka pug!) right along with the bed. It was interesting to say the least.

Today I reorganized my room a bit.. moved some of the smaller furnature and I'm sure Judy won't approve as I've wanted to do this since forever, but oh well. She ticked me off again today so I feel justified in my decision.


I love how with the GPF the people on Golden Skate are counting Evan out. Ok, since when has bubba really made an announcement that he is the one to beat early in the season? Yeah, he's gotten dinged big time this year and yes his programs could be better (Yagudin programs just don't look good on him) but Bradley beating Evan? That'll be the day.

Unless Evan tanks like Johnny in Spokane. But just based on if both skate their best, I don't think so. But whatever. At this point I honestly don't care lol I will be in Disney World when it all goes down and I won't even know about it all until I get home... unless someone calls with updates (I don't have text messaging! *Cries*) lol

Haille Rae and her parents are coming for dinner tomorrow. yay! :)

TTFN

1) What did you do in 2008 that you'd never done before?
Paid for a disney world trip for two all on my own... visited St. Paul MN... suffered from the second step of hypothermia (in St. Paul)... met Scott Hamilton... hee hee

2) Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I don't make them

3) Did anyone close to you give birth?
Several of my friends did.

4) Did anyone close to you die?
Grampy passed away on the 31st of last year. And then Tesa and Steve and Casey and Dan lost their first born sons. :(

5) What countries did you visit?
Just my own.

6) What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
A Full-time, year round job. Success. No drama. And -like Heather- a boyfriend, or at least a date.

7) What date from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
January 23, 2008 that's when the article came out announcing the birth of Scott's son Maxx... and it was on MY BIRTHDAY (Jan 21)...

8) What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Getting my business license I guess.

9) What was your biggest failure?
School. Let's just leave it at that.

10) Did you suffer illness or injury?
Nothing major. Though I did have a health scare last spring.

11) What was the best thing you bought?
Probably the Disney trip

12) Whose behavior merited celebration?
Johnny Weir and Evan Lysacek at the Men's award ceremony at Nationals. That was a tense one till they started clowning around.
Erin. Because she's awesome.
Becky and her whole stinkin family thorugh this whole gaylord mess.
Heather and Binky because they rock...
My dad... for being my dad.

13) Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Gaylord and Judy.

14) Where did most of your money go?
Nationals, Disney World, Yuka's vet bill, and Disney world again.

15) What did you get really, really, really excited about?
US Nats in St. Paul; Working at Wildride (because I'm a dork); Disney World with Erin!

16) What song will always remind you of 2008?
"The Monkey Song" - VeggieTales

17) Compared to this time last year, are you:
- happier or sadder?
I'm less content, more frustrated.

- thinner or fatter?
Thinner

- richer or poorer?
Poorer

18) What do you wish you'd done more of?
Gone out and made more friends/relationships at V180 (I'm working on it, slowly...), worked more, done better at school.

19) What do you wish you'd done less of?
Pouting, being negative, complaining, forgetting all the blessings in my life and dwelling on the things I don't have, ignoring problems and hoping they'll go away

^---Yeah, what Heather said.

20) How will you be spending Christmas?
With family like always.

21) Did you fall in love in 2008?
Not romantically.

22) How many one-night stands?
None

23) What was your favorite TV program?
HOUSE!

24) Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Well I wouldn't quite put it at hate, but Gaylord has made the hit list.

25) What was the best book you read?
The Yukon/Alaska series that Brittany gave me for my bday!

26) What was your greatest musical discovery?
no idea.

27) What did you want and get?
Disney world... my job at Wildride back... um... oh Evan Lysacek's autograph... and Maxx Hamilton born on my bday! ;)

28) What did you want and not get?
New camera gear, a real job, better grades lol

29) What was your favorite film of this year?
WALL-E!

30) What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
Hypothermia... and -again- Maxx Hamilton born on my bday!... I turned 23 lol

31) What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
my independence.

32) How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
Comfortable

33) What kept you sane?
Define sane ;). Nationals trip, Wildride, and Erin - the three most insane things kept me sane.

34) Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Sarah Palin, Evan Lysacek, Kurt Browning... basically the usual.

35) What political issue stirred you the most?
Presidential everything... and Ted Stevens trial.

36) Who did you miss?
Erin, my skating buddies, Jillian

37) Who was the best new person you met?
Brad Hislop

38) Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008:
Never be afraid to say hello.

39) Quote a song lyric that sums up your year
"Crying... crying.... CRRRRRRRRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYIIIIIIIINNNNNNNGGGGGGG"

Gaylord was in rare form ALL DAY yesterday. I was about ready to kick him at 8:30am! He chewed me out for being lazy and blah blah blah and all I wanted to do was slam my door in his face because I am sick of the crap. His anti-Erin and anti-my trip thing is getting so annoying. I'm sorry, when did you become my father? Or really anyone in authority over me... oh, that's right, never! (seriously why does his family want him back? he's a massive tool)

Then, when he was done ranting I shut my door saying I was getting ready for my day. Which I was lying because I hadn't even showered yet, but whatever. I just needed an excuse, ya know?

Anyway he starts knocking on the door telling me I can't do laundry (I hadn't planned on doing any anyway) because the toilet was broken and he had parts all over the place. Translation - he backed up the toilet and left the mess. I told him I wouldn't go in there and left it at that.

Fastforward to Judy coming home and she comes into my room and asks about the 'damage'. I told her Gaylord told me NOT to go in there and so I didn't so I had no clue.

Bubba REALLY clogged up the toilet and the water hadn't gone down and Noah's flood had happened on the floor (he cleaned up a little bit, I'll give him that). So she started in plunging and it wasn't moving at all. So she decided to go to Ace Hardware across the street and find something stronger. Just about that time Gaylord came home and basically ripped her a new one for even teh idea of going out and spending money that the water would go down on its own. Considering he'd been gone for 8+ hours and the water hadn't gone down at all in that time should be an indication that you can't just wait for it to go down.

Then he got pissed off because she dared to say that HE clogged it. He swears up and down she did it (never mind HE was in that freaking bathroom doing God knows what in there for an HOUR After she left. TOOL)

So Judy got all ticked off for him being ticked off and it was just really tense in the house for a while. I offered to help with dinner and she nearly bit my head off. So much for finding a guy to make your life better, eh?

He slammed the door of the computer room - his computer is dying and that was way more important than the toilet he flooded. So Judy cooked dinner (yeay for fried chicken) and even THAT wasn't good for Gaylord because it's so unhealthy (he's the dude with the fat gut who eats rich foods all the time I just wanted to deck him).

By this time Erin called so I was on the phone with her for about an hour and then Gaylord gets on one of the other phones and tells me to get off. Erin didn't hear him so he got PISSED and was BANGING on my door and screaming that I needed to get off the phone now and that it wasn't just MY phone and I needed to HANG UP NOW. So I got Erin to shut up (she was singing) long enough for me to tell her I needed to go ASAP.

Then the phone died on Gaylord (I don't think it died I think he hit the wrong button) and he threw it out of the room and got one of the other phones... that also died on him ( I still think HE did something to hang up ) and he was just so mad because the dang phones were all crap and he couldn't get his blessed computer to work.

I'd had it up to here with him and took my dog out and then went to bed.









This morning he just told me not to touch his computer (like I ever have anyway) and that I needed to stay off the phone. I want to spite him so bad, but I'm afraid of what sort of tantrum it'll bring on. He's such a massive tool. I'm sure he'll play perfect angel while my parents are here (and he doesn't want them here at all but tough cookies, princess).


I just find it interesting that this coupling that God helped with (they say He brought them together) also seems to be thwarted by God. I do believe that all of these little bad things that are happening have more to do with God's disapproval of this whole thing than anything else. Granted, I don't believe either one of them are Christians, but at the same time Gaylord alone has gone above and beyond what's normal in the sin department... it's just so frustrating.

I'm not saying Judy shouldn't find a guy and fall in love and all of that, but no one in her immediate family approves of how she's going about it. She keeps lying to everyone - including herself - when she says my mom agrees with this partnership... or that Tony (Tom's son) does. Tony and I talked the other day on the phone and I don't think he approves as much as she says...

But yeah. It feels good to vent. 32 days until I am out of this situation for 12 days... I cannot wait!

God is so amazing, and He shows Himself in the most wonderful of ways. I am loving getting to watch Him work in the lives of my friends. Casey and Dan got to bring Zoe home the other day and the pictures are beautiful. Zoe is all smiles (granted at this age she has no control but still, I don't remember Haille smiling so much as that little one does lol). Asher's baby sister fits so well with them, it will be neat to see how she grows up.

I have to take the dogs to the vet today, and I need to pick up stamps to mail all my Christmas cards with... oh and I almost forgot I need to call WDW right now! ack!

and I'm off!

and sometimes it's at break neck speed!

My friend Casey and her husband Dan emailed family and friends right before Thanksgiving that they were applying to adopt a baby girl. Then before the weekend was out they were chosen by the biological mother to be her baby's forever parents. Today, their little girl made her appearance in the world...

They lost Asher just a few months ago, and this couldnt have come at a better time! :) Congrats Casey and Dan!

(see the whole story here - http://caseychappell.typepad.com/baby/ )

... Ben Porn shot! hee hee.

I'd just like NBC Universal to NOT use any of their normal color commentators for figure skating this next Olympics. They're incompetant, they don't even PRETEND to appreciate the sport, and they just aren't needed... especially since NBC crams five bazillion experts in the booth.


The show was so cheesey, and did we ever find out who Italian Ice was? I can't remember lol

I'm not going to go into a sappy what I'm thankful for post today. Maybe Wednesday or the actual Turkey Day... but I will say I am so happy for this week to be a short one!

I'm not getting to go to Kenai like I'd hoped, I think I'm okay with it. All three of us are going over to my g'parents house again this year. Hooray for crowded! blah. I think G'ma's looking at something like 15 people this year! yikes!

Nothing else is really going on. Had a weird dream about one of my classes last night... it was a good dream, but weird.

Gotta finish up a paper and harass Erin a bit on facebook. TTYL!

...it's being talked about on all of the skating boards and egroups. Dewey Browning's battle with male breast cancer is over. I guess CBC did a little blurb at the end of their broadcast. He was such a figure head in Canadian/Men's skating not just as "Kurt's Dad" but as someone who genuinely cared about the sport his son participated in. Both Neva and Dewey were committed to Kurt's endeavors but also strived to raise him to be more than just a jock, and he's taken those lessons to heart. The world needs more like them, and sadly we've had to lose them.

I don't know where I'm going with this, so I'll stop before I seem completely looney. My prayers are with Kurt and the entire Browning family tonight as they mourn the loss of their father & grandfather. You'll be missed, Dewey!

I've been doing my best to not get sick, but last night I was defeated. I don't have a full blown cold but I just feel incredibly run down. The three day migraine hasn't helped, either. It's managable today, though. Which is good, because I don't want to miss another one of Edgar's classes. haha!

We're currently watching Salvador in class, it is not a very good film, if you ask me. Personally if a film only uses the same three swear words and very little else, it's not worth watching. My paper on the film will probably not be very good. Then again neither was my paper on Outfoxed. And before you think I just defended FoxNews, I didn't. I can't stand the program either, but I hate that the people on the movie said that Fox is the only biased network out there. It's like the kettle calling the pot black. That the press tries to say they don't push one candidate or agenda over another is absurd. In a perfect world journalism would stay neutral but it NEVER HAS. Look at how the Revolution was started, or just about every war we learn about in school. It starts with some big wig deciding to take a side. Why else would celebrities keep pushing in the news about Darfur? Duh! The news influences people to think whatever way the news wants. We're just dumb enough to take them as truth.

That was the gist of my paper, I have a feeling I'm going to get a poor grade for the first time in his class because we don't agree on that. I have come to the conclusion that in order to get a good grade in journalism courses you have to blindly follow and agree with the prof or you won't get far. So it won't surprise me if Edgar is the same as just about every other prof I've had in that department. The only one I didn't have to worry about was Prof. Dillehey, but I haven't taken from him since that one class (I don't even know if he's still in the program!).


I also have no doubt the main topic of class will be Ted Stevens' concession yesterday allowing Begich to become our newly elected senator. Personally I am disappointed in my state's voters for two reasons. 1. we voted in Begich who is a moron (and I don't base that on his politics. the man is a moronic jerk who is only in it for the spotlight) and 2. we almost voted in a convicted felon. There was a perfectly acceptable third choice, IMO, and he was the one I voted for. Bob Bird would stand for Alaska and was not backed by a party or cause. Unlike Begich who allowed the very people he's promising Alaskans he will stand up against. Yeah. Right. Like they're going to pay for you to disagree with them. Fat chance of that.


Oh well. Six years from now we'll be sick of him (save for the church of Begich known as Anchorage) and we'll have someone replace him. Who it will be, who knows, but this is the first time in 40 years we've had two weak senators... Murkowski's just as big a joke IMHO and she's a "Republican". I quit! lol


I just called down to WDW this morning and paid off our balance. You may be thinking that we'd already did that, and we had, but with the new promotion they've got out (buy 4 nights at a resort and 4 days worth of park admission get 3 free) we were holding out hope for getting a Moderate resort - specifically the Coronado Springs. As you might have read in my last journal update. I am so very excited to be going there again. I told Erin she has to take a picture of me giving the resort a big hug. I've missed it. I could stay there every time and not feel like I was missing out on a thing!

Gaylord is home. Not sure why. Either he is checking up on me to see if I actually leave the house, or he keeps peeing his pants because he keeps having to come home to "change". I'm not sure that that is all about, but it annoys me.

It also annoys me that Judy borrowed a few of my CDs and I haven't gotten them back even though I've asked her about them. Then I get woken up at midnight last night because Gaylord is working on a stupid slide show or something and what's playing? Josh GROBAN... and it's MY CD. All you have to do is ASK, but it's really annoying that she leant MY cd to him without even asking me when she knows I've been looking for my CDs. I have use for those disks too! BLAH.


Yes, I'm a selfish little brat, but I'm just asking for a little bit of respect. Though, I haven't been the best of buddies with either of them as of late. I'm getting really tired of Gaylord trying to be the "man of his domain" and telling Judy and I what to do. He hit the roof the other night when Judy snow blowed the drive way. He said he'd do it. Yeah, well, it'd been four days since it snowed and you still hadn't gotten off your fat duff so sit down and shut up. He started yelling at me that I should have done it before Judy did. Um. I was in class when she did it. And YOU kept saying that it was YOUR job. So I stayed out of it.

Apparently he doesn't get enough jollies or something or he'd shut up and leave me alone.

He also decided it was his duty to tell me I was spending my money unwisely and that I was an ungrateful person to use my parents money in the way I was. Meaning - I shouldn't go on this Disney trip (Judy wants to go on one with him and he isn't into the idea). I got REALLY snotty with him and told him that it was MY money and ONLY my money that I was using on this trip. I worked VERY hard this summer to get it (ok so not VERY) and I saved it FOR THIS PURPOSE. I also got permission from my PARENTS (even though I am 23 and therefore an adult that does not NEED it, I still ask for it) and JUDY (whom I still owe for the last trip). I paid off a vet bill, a dentist bill, and a couple of other things before I booked the trip. AND then there's the check that came in September from the State of Alaska that was over 2,000 big ones (plus 1200 energy check). That was MY money, not my parents. I'm not using money from school or anything. I said if anything Judy was the only one who had right to say I needed to give HER the money and not go on the trip.

Then he tried to be her proxy and suggest that's what I needed to do. Considering JUDY was the one who said I should do it if I could afford it at the beginning of the summer, I knew that was crap. And if she DOES truly feel that way she should come out and say it. She's looking forward to 12 days of just her and Gaylord in the house with the dogs. She hasn't been this excited to be rid of me in a while (which kinda hurts), so I somehow doubt she'd be happy if we canceled this trip and I gave her the money.


Then Gaylord plays the wounded dog card about how he doesn't know how to get me to like him and sends Judy to make things right. How about stay out of my buisness and stop trying to be all controlling? I'm a bull headed REITTER. We don't take other people's crap lying down. You are not the one that is 'over me'. I am not your daughter, nor am I your wife (EW). I don't need to be submissive to you. so stuff it.


Isn't it amazing that I can make such a long entry when I have nothing of interest to say. I should just stop talking. ha ha. so I will. Have a nice week everyone (since it's almost over!)

01. Name a movie that you have seen more than 10 times.
Star Wars, Big Fish, The Producers, Pirates, Forrest Gump, Sleeping Beauty, and many others.

02. Name a movie that you’ve seen multiple times in the theater.
Big Fish, Pirates, Finding Nemo, Revenge of the Sith

03. Name an actor that would make you more inclined to see a movie.
Orlando Bloom, Johnny Depp, Brad Pitt, Hugh Laurie. Keira Knightly, Ewan McGregor... ok I'll stop lol

04. Name an actor that would make you less likely to see a movie.
LINDSAY LOHAN, George Clooney (unless it's an Ocean's movie), Adam Sandler, Jim Carrey, Will Ferrel, Cate Blanchett, Shia LeBouf, Hayden Christensen... just to name a few

05. Name a movie that you can quote from.
Just about all of them! LOL Pirates, Star Wars, Nemo, The Producers

06. Name a movie musical that you know all the lyrics to all the songs.
The Producers.

07. Name a movie that you have been known to sing along with.
The Producers, Meet Me In St. Louis, Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat.

08. Name a movie that you would recommend everyone see.
WALL-E (gonna watch it before bed tonight!)

09. Name a movie that you own.
According to my excell spreadsheet I have over two hundred films here in Anchorage, and I'm sure I have close to that at home in Kenai... first one to come to my head - Sleeping Beauty

10. Name an actor that launched his/her entertainment career in another medium but who has surprised you with his/her acting chops.
Dame Julie Andrews - singing/vaudville, Martin Short - comedian, Robin Williams - comedian

11. Have you ever seen a movie in a drive-in?
Unfortunately that's not a cost effective medium up here.

12. Ever made out in a movie?
Um. That'd be NO.

13. Name a movie that you keep meaning to see but just haven’t gotten around to it.
Robin Hood: Men in Tights (because my best friend tells me I have to see it, not because I want to.)

14. Ever walked out of a movie?
No, though I wanted to during Mean Girls and Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen.

15. Name a movie that made you cry in the theater.
Revenge of the Sith (yes, really), At World's End (the second time, the first time I was shocked and ticked off), Wall-E

16. Popcorn?
I'm not allowed - it makes me hyper. Nachos or Cinnibon!

17. How often do you go to the movies (as opposed to renting them or watching them at home)?
Now that Gaylord's here, I don't get to go to the movies. Stupid fat man.

18. What’s the last movie you saw in the theater?
Wall-E

19. What’s your favorite/preferred genre of movie?
Action Adventure, Disney

20. What’s the first movie you remember seeing in the theater?
It was a double feature of The Land Before Time and Oliver & Company.

21. What movie do you wish you had never seen?
Just about every movie I've watched for my movies class this semester, and every Lindsay Lohan movie I've ever been suckered into seeing.

22. What is the weirdest movie you enjoyed?
I guess Elizabethtown since it's not your typical feel good movie... or Dan In Real Life.

23. What is the scariest movie you’ve seen?
Hush, Hush, Sweet Charlotte

24. What is the funniest movie you’ve seen?
Father of the Bride (Remake) 1 & 2, Home Alone 2, The Producers (the Musical), Pirates, and THE THREE AMIGOS!



in other news - Erin and I were able to get the resort upgrade that we wanted for 8 nights of our trip! We're going to be staying at the Coronado Springs resort from Jan 11 through to the 19th, then we switch over to the Pop Century for the 19th through the 22nd. I stayed at the Coronado last summer with the family and I can't wait to go back, I'm so glad Erin picked it! hee hee! It has the biggest hot tub which I think was a big ticket item for her! ;)

I think I'm tryin to come down with a cold, I've been feeling really crappy as of late. I hope I'm wrong, I don't want to be sick for the holidays again.

Keegan Messing - Anchorage, Alaska figure skater! - won the Pacific Coast Sectionals today! I am so excited for him! I seriously let out a fangirl squeal and bounced on my bed! I am so happy that he pulled it out. He got a decent score, I think, I honestly don't follow Juniors all that much. Aside from Keegan I guess I could care less lol which is sad, but it's just hard to keep up with everything all the time!

So proud of him! *bounces*

FPl. Name Points SP FS
1 Keegan Messing
Anchorage FSC 176.50 3 1
2 Austin Kanallakan
Los Angeles FSC 161.29 1 2
3 Andrew Gonzales
All Year FSC 154.93 2 3
4 David Wang
All Year FSC 138.64 8 4
5 John Lomazzi
Peninsula SC 134.70 6 5
6 Grisha Fournier
All Year FSC 127.78 5 6
7 Sean Rabbitt
Glacier Falls FSC 127.52 4 8
8 Stanislav Samohin
Los Angeles FSC 125.54 7 7
9 Dan Dang
Portland ISC 111.45 9 9

Well, I'm going to start casting a line for jobs up here. I am thinking that the job market is more open up here than it is in Kenai, and I really don't want to pack up and move at the moment.

If this is what God wants He'll open the doors and make His will known. If not, Kenai here I come.


I also have a wedding to look forward to. Ellie and Jake got engaged about a month or so ago and they're getting married in April! I'm so excited for them. :) It'll be, no doubt, a lot of fun, and it'll mean I get to drive down to Kenai for a while this spring. So that will be good (that's if I'm not already down there). Either way I am not missing this for anything. Seriously if we were planning a trip to Disney I'd cancel to go to this. They're a special couple and I'd hate myself if I missed it. (I work with Jake in the summer, and got to know Ellie this year and I love 'em!)



Another thing that has brought my spirits up - Heather and Erin taking over my facebook quoting Friends episodes. Hysterical. It's amazing how God uses the littlest things to brighten my day. Right now I'm waiting for the second part of the One In London to come on TV, and it brings up great memories of every trip I've taken with Erin since graduating! We always use Joey's "LONDON, BABY!" and switch it to our destination. "Portland, Baby" "Disney, Baby" "California, Baby!" "Grass Valley, Baby!".... freaking awesome. I love it!

So far I've found six job listings that I am 1. qualified for 2. is not temporary 3. something I would actually enjoy. I haven't looked at Kenai, yet, but I will probably look tomorrow.

Speaking of Tomorrow. I have a lot to do. I have to rewrite my resume and cover letter, take a bunch of stuff out to the post office, and work on Erin's Christmas 'gift'.

So it's off to finish this Friends epi, and then off to bed, off to bed...

Gonna watch Atonement tomorrow, too.

Kenai Pros:
I'd be closer to mom and dad as I'd be living back at home.
I'd be living at home so I can save money to move out at some point.
My Photography clientele is much higher down there.
It's easier to get around on a bike or walking.
I have friends there, I think.


Kenai Cons:
I'd be back living at home.
Less privacy than what I have in Anchorage.
It's more expensive down in Kenai, and less stuff is available.
I'd be giving up my ministry at ABT - which puts Pastor Bruce in a bind.
Probably won't have a vehicle of my own.
If I do have a vehicle that's an added expense.
Friends are there, but we've lost touch and I doubt that will change.



more later.

First off thank you, Heather and Betsy (hee hee, your real name!), for your encouragement and prayers, not just today but always. I truly treasure our friendship (I treasure all of my friends - don't feel left out). I thank God for sisters in Christ like you.

This morning was difficult. I didn't do well this morning school wise much less mentally. I got in the truck, turned onto Muldoon on the way to the school and lost it. All I could think of what how I was letting everyone down if I didn't finish school. I'm the only grandchild my g'parents have (so far) that has even attempted college, and they have very high hopes for me. It's one of many pressures that has kept me going and at the same time it's driven me crazy because I don't want to let them down.

Then thinking of my parents and how I want to make them proud and how much money and energy they've spent on my school career and how I'm throwing it all away... blah! I just let Satan have his way with my thoughts for the morning and it will be relfected in my grades. If I ail this test in Anthro there's no way I can fix it to get a passing grade for the end of the semester. Thank God I have a week left before I can no longer withdraw.

Then this afternoon I helped Judy put the Halloween stuff away and get the fall/Thanksgiving stuff up. She's okay with me staying here if I want to and working to be able to afford my own place.

Dad called a couple hours ago and we chatted for an hour and a half. I cried a couple of times, it was just what I needed to hear. This morning as I was crying I started screaming out to God saying "I just need to hear someone tell me that it's OKAY" and not just the words, I needed to KNOW. And dad said that and more.

We did more laughing than serious talking. I just don't know. I told dad I'm so frustrated with God because it seems He doesn't want to tell me what I need to do, just what I don't need to do. Dad didn't have an answer, but he said that I needed to look at all the options that might be available. Dad also told me that I am not a loser or a failure, and that I'm his daughter and he doesn't care what I do so long as it's in God's plan. Which was incredibly comforting, but at the same time made me cry. To know dad is proud even when I feel like the lowest sort of person, it really helps.

Dad said he's worried about me (my emails haven't been all that happy to them), and that he wants me to just take it a day at a time. I think mom and dad want me home. But like I said in here earlier, and told dad tonight, I don't know just yet if that's what God wants or what I would see as easiest (or if that's what I'm doing by staying here). I have a couple of months before I seriously need to decide, but it's something that I need to keep looking into.

*sigh* I'm drained again before I finished my thoughts. It's 10pm and I didn't sleep well last night (maybe six hours of sleep).


Night, all!

Last night I started breaking down while studying. I've never hyperventalated while reading an Anthro book before. I litterally just got sick, and there was no reason why other than I've been having some incredibly negative thoughts about life, school, everything.

I had a sort of revelation yesterday driving home from church - the only time I feel fullfilled, and joyful, and happy with myself is when I am working with the girls. Yeah, they drive me nuts, but that's the only time that I feel like I'm in the *right place*.

It's really not a surprise since it is the only time I'm around fellow believers and I can truly feel God's spirit moving. But that goes to show that I need to get out of here soon.

I talked with Pastor Bruce yesterday morning letting him know of my current living situation and that I wanted him to be aware even if that changed my 'status' as a teacher. He said that since I did not condone their living together and that I knew, understood, and agreed with God's ruling on the subject that he saw no harm in it, but that he felt that I needed to try and find a way to get out. I told him I knew that I needed out, but that it looked like the only way out meant going back to Kenai since I wouldn't be able to afford an apartment that was in a good part of town, and that took dogs. He said he really didn't want to lose me, but that I had to do what was best for me... and what was with God's plan.

And that's just it. I have no clue what God wants. I like the idea of home and I don't. I like the idea of staying here and I don't. I don't want to leave ABT, but other than my little class of girls and the other sunday school teachers I am not that connected. That's my own choice, I just don't warm up to people easily. I do have a few friends from my sunday school class, but I just see them on Sundays.

But at home, I won't be much better off. I'm closer to the 'adults' at FBCK than the one or two people my age that still attend. Though that might change, if I go back. I know that area better, and I know there are people that want me to come back so I can do photos, but I don't have the equipment I want/need.

Anyway, I decided I needed a break, now it's just figuring out what I'm going to do. Either way I'm getting a job once I get back from Disney. Not a seasonal one (which probably means Wildride is out next summer.) I need to be able to afford my own place at some point. And I need to get a vehicle. Not sure what Judy wants for the truck, but I'm not sure I want the truck anyway.


Please just keep me in prayer. I'll update more later but I have to get going to class.

I spent yesterday afternoon and evening organizing my room. No more massive piles of papers everywhere. I looks nice.

I ripped my summer comforter a couple of nights ago and had to throw it out, so now I have my winter one, but I'm still too warm at night because Gaylord HAS to have it be flipping HOT in the house at all times. It's one of the many things he whines about. The dork lived in Minnesota and he thinks ALASKA is cold. Um, yeah, no!

He and Judy are going to some food thing today. I find it ironic that he is "encouraging" her to lose weight, but the man can't stand leftovers and he is always talking food (or eating it). Then when his blood sugar goes wonky we have to deal with him whining that he's sick. It's getting very hard for me not to bark out a "well then EAT RIGHT". He refuses to eat a diabetic diet saying he can watch his sugar. Um, yeah, you've come home EARLY from work EVERY DAY THIS WEEK because of way too high blood sugar. How the freaking heck does that say you can control it?

BLAH!

He also gets teed off if I have left overs and I "clog the fridge" with them. The man sits there and eats as much as possible so that they don't have left overs. Judy's had to tell him to stop lately because she's freaking out about the blood sugar thing. There's a reason we make enough for left overs - it's so we have stuff for lunch the next day.

Anyway back to cleaning my room. I was told by Gaylord this is the way I need to keep my room from here on out. I told him that we'll see. When I get stressed and have a lot to do, piles happen. I clean out twice a semester, normally. When Christmas hits and family's here then I will clean again so the 'rents have a place to crash while they're here (if they come, with dad working at Lowes now he may not get the time off *sad*). Considering the man's work station in the "office" room is a complete disaster I don't know where he gets off telling me what I'm going to do with mine.

I seriously don't know why his wife wants him back.

Anyway, today my bathroom is going into scrub down mode - as soon as they're gone for the day, I don't want either one of them hovering - the tub is in serious need of a good scrub, and I still haven't put my stuff away from my last trip to Kenai. Sad, I know.

I also have to cram for my second Anthropology "mid-term." which is going to happen on...... Monday. Blah!

Well, people are moving in the house, so I better get moving. Chat at all of you later.

I can't shake this funk that I am in. I don't think any one thing has set me off, after election night I've been okay with the whole deal, the thing that sets me off with a very short fuse is the dang skating board.

I guess I'm just sick of people right now. LOL. I don't think I will ever be one of those people persons. I'm completely unmotivated to do anything. And I mean, seriously, anything. The whole days go by and I don't have anything to show for it.

I seriously have hit rock bottom in a way. I don't see myself moving forward. Heck, I don't see myself as moving any direction. I'm just in one place.

I have all these dreams and I don't even attempt to start making them happen.

*sigh*