Let's Celebrate, It's All Right!

Okay, it's obvious where they were going with this, but I still find it fantasically funny.

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

Good luck to those who still have to vote tomorrow! May the right man for the job win.

Erin wrote a song 2 years ago on our road trip to the tune of on the road again to celebrate the end of our adventure...

now we've once again taken a song and run with it. The following is the longest song in the world (we think anyway lol took long enough to write!). I can't take much credit, aside for a couple of verses and a few grammatical/spelling corrections I didn't do much work. This is all Erin!

So here it is, in all of it's glory!

"We Want Disney"
(To the Tune of "I Got Rythym")

Oh the countdown's -
Finally ended!
Off we go, oh!
Who could ask for anything more

I am flying -
To Seattle!
To see Toni!
Who could ask for anything more!

Look there’s Toni! She looks angry!
Should not ask questions anymore!

( Way more under here! )

If you see a fat man......


Who's jolly and cute,
wearing a beard
and a red flannel suit,
and if he is chuckling
and laughing away,



while flying around
in a miniature sleigh
with eight tiny reindeer
to pull him along,



then let's face it...





Your eggnog's too strong!

I hope everyone has a very Merry Christmas!

saw this on a pug message board and I had to make an icon :) (Jeb Bush has a few pugs, I think... always liked them Bush people)

comment credit enjoy!

Pastor Prevo told this joke this morning at church... a couple of sundays ago he got a lot of crap from people who didn't like his joke about Kerry so he did one on Bush ;)


Kerry and Bush were walking along the beach with the Pope. Suddenly a gust of wind knocked the Pope's hat off and it dropped far out into the water. Kerry immediately jumped in after it determined to bring the Pope's hat back. However the waves were carrying the hat out faster than he could swim and he had to turn back. He returns unsuccessful and apologizes to the Pope. Bush then decides to go after it and runs out over the water and retrieves that hat and brings it back. The next day the headlines read: "Bush can't swim".


X-posted all over.

( another political something )

What I Want in a Man
What I Want in a Man, Original List

1. Handsome
2. Charming
3. Financially successful
4. A caring listener
5. Witty
6. In good shape
7. Dresses with style
8. Appreciates finer things
9. Full of thoughtful surprises
10. An imaginative, romantic lover

What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 32)

1. Nice looking (prefer hair on his head)
2. Opens car doors, holds chairs
3. Has enough money for a nice dinner
4. Listens more than talks
5. Laughs at my jokes
6. Carries bags of groceries with ease
7. Owns at least one tie
8. Appreciates a good home-cooked meal
9. Remembers birthdays and anniversaries
10. Seeks romance at least once a week

What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 42)

1. Not too ugly (bald head OK)
2. Doesn't drive off until I'm in the car
3. Works steady - splurges on dinner out occasionally
4. Nods head when I'm talking
5. Usually remembers punch lines of jokes
6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture
7. Wears a shirt that covers his stomach
8. Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids
9. Remembers to put the toilet seat down
10. Shaves most weekends

What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 52)

1. Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed
2. Doesn't belch or scratch in public
3. Doesn't borrow money too often
4. Doesn't nod off to sleep when I'm venting
5. Doesn't retell the same joke too many times
6. Is in good enough shape to get off couch on weekends
7. Usually wears matching socks and fresh underwear
8. Appreciates a good TV dinner
9. Remembers your name on occasion
10. Shaves some weekends

What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 62)

1. Doesn't scare small children
2. Remembers where bathroom is
3. Doesn't require much money for upkeep
4. Only snores lightly when asleep
5. Remembers why he's laughing
6. Is in good enough shape to stand up by himself
7. Usually wears some clothes
8. Likes soft foods
9. Remembers where he left his teeth
10. Remembers that it's the weekend

What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 72)

1. Breathing
2. Doesn't miss the toilet

Just thought I'd share, EZBoard is making me mad today... again! LOL

How many message board readers does it take to change a lightbulb?

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed..

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently..

7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs..

1 to demand it be moved to the Lighting section..

2 to argue that it be moved to the Electricals section..

7 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs..

5 to flame the spell checkers..

3 to correct spelling/grammar flames..

6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ... another 6 to condemn those 6 as stupid..

2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"..

15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct..

19 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb forum..

11 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum..

36 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty..

7 to post URLs where one can see examples of different light bulbs..

4 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URLs..

3 to post about links they found from the URLs that are relevant to this group, which makes light bulbs relevant to this group..

13 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "me too"..

5 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy..

4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"..

13 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"..

and 1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again.

NORTH OF FORTY


Why Mature Men Don't Ask for Directions When We're Lost

Okay it all comes down to pride. We're out there driving around in our own vehicle, burning gas, wearing sunglasses, looking good. People who see us driving by would never guess that we have no idea where we are. And we don't want to tell them. Men don't enjoy the concept of going up to total strangers and saying "You may not know this but I'm a moron." In contrast the woman we're traveling with is often very anxious to share this knowledge with the world. It somehow eases her burden. To women, getting lost on a trip is a blameless act of nature - to men it's a personal failure. He knew where he was when he left home - he doesn't know where he is now. Somewhere along the line he crossed the line from the world he knows into the world he doesn't know. To a man this is how he felt when he got married or had kids. If he admits he's lost in the car, he'll have to admit that he's lost everywhere and that's way too much to ask. So just bite your tongue and circle the block a few more times. Men aren't lost, they just go the long way.

The Day the Music Died

Have you tried to find a good radio station lately, one that plays good driving music? There aren't any. It's all yakkity yak--with news, or talk shows or rap music. You start to wonder, where did our music go? What happened to the great music that defined our generation? Well, I'll tell you where it went. And it's good news, for a change. Our music is in the clearance bin down at the hardware store. You can pick up five...maybe six tapes for the cost of one of them CD things. And it's our music. With words you can hear and understand. Words that tell a story without a video. And the women sing songs about men. And the men sing songs about women. And surfing. And hot rods. I know it's depressing to see the music of your life stacked beside the special discount shampoo and the two-for-one light bulb sale, but that's okay, because it's finally at a price you can afford.

The Seven Stages of Parking

Stage One - You're a kid. All you have to park is your butt.

Stage Two - You're a teenager and you park with a girl who has a good chance of being your future wife.

Stage Three - You're married with kids and are parking a mini-van at McDonald's.

Stage Four - The kids are grown and working at McDonald's, you've got a sports car and are caught parking with a girl who has no chance of being your future wife.

Stage Five - You're parking in the garage for a while, where you're also living.

Stage Six - You're old, no car no license no parking spot.

Stage Seven - You're parked. Permanently. In your own space. Even has your name over it.

We Have Nothing to Say

Every week more and more guys are "coming out" of the tool room and admitting it. Admitting we have nothing to say, to anyone, about anything. I know that feeling. And your wife probably understands. You've said it all before. You're still with her. You have nothing to add. And this is all right. Unfortunately some guys who have nothing to say still keep talking. Like, if you find yourself ranting about the way people are parking cars on your street, well, you have nothing to say. Stop talking. If you find yourself going on and on about why Jeopardy is way better than Wheel of Fortune, or about how hard it is to open those new orange juice containers, or the high price of hammers, you have nothing to say. If you notice you're telling everyone a hilarious story that you read in Reader's Digest--stop talking. People aren't listening to you. The person you're talking to has glazed over and is just nodding their head, while they make up a grocery list or plan their winter vacation, or vow never to get as old and boring as you. So don't just keep talking until you think of something worth saying. You may not.

Quote of the Day

"If it ain't broke, don't lend it."

- Red Green